01 / CHAIRMAN
Chairman & CEO
The dog. Final authority. Flat stare.
STATUS: HOLDING
Established. Apparently.
Hold this for a sec.
Bull Terrier Capital. One asset. One manager. Zero exits.
Chairman Holding Period
Days since the Chairman was asked to hold the bag
0000 days, 00:00:00
The guy never came back.
01 / The Origin
The origin
A job listing said: “Wanted: Bull. Must be aggressive. Must hold.”
A bull terrier walked in. Nobody had the heart to correct it. A guy said “hold this bag for a sec” and left for lunch.
Two years later it is still “a sec.”
02 / Corporate Structure
Corporate structure
02 / FINANCE
CFO
Also the dog.
03 / RISK
Head of Risk Management
The dog. zzz
04 / COMPLIANCE
Compliance Department
One squeaky toy. One policy.
05 / EXIT
Sell Button
Decorative.
06 / EARNINGS
Quarterly Earnings Call
45 minutes of yawning. Stock goes up anyway.
03 / Exit Strategy
The sell button
For compliance purposes, this button is present.
04 / Partner Ranks
Partner ranks
01
Intern
Just bought. Asks “wen moon.”
02
Associate
Survived one red candle.
03
VP: Very Persistent
Has seen things. Still holding.
04
Managing Director of Never Selling
The job is mostly not clicking anything.
05
Paper Hands
Escorted out with a cardboard box.
05 / Governance
The bylaws
01
The Chairman does not sell.
02
The Chairman does not explain. He is a dog.
03
The Chairman’s market analysis is “...” followed by a stare.
04
Any Partner who says “just taking profits” will be followed to their car by the dog, who is not angry, only confused.
05
There is no rule 5. The dog ate it.
06 / Chairman’s Quarterly Letter
Quarterly letter
Dear Partners,
Bag.
Sincerely,
Woof.
07 / Communications
Meme kit
PFP / 1:1
BANNER / 3:1
STICKER PACK
POST / 4:5
MEME / 1:1
Ready-made posts
08 / Acquisition
How to buy
01
Connect your wallet to the launchpad.
02
Paste the contract address. Verify it independently.
03
Decide your own risk. The dog has no opinion.
Contract address
[PASTE HERE]
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